35 weeks and a Little Scare

30weeks on the left, 35 weeks on the right :)

I am 35 weeks, 2 days. 12 more days until I'm full term!! That means 12 more days until we can have our home birth. It seems so close, but it feels so far away. Last week we had a bit of a scare. I started having pretty consistent (and painful) contractions around 9:30pm on Wednesday. It continued through the night and I didn't get a bit of sleep. I ended up taking an Epsom salt bath and praying that I would make it til morning, when I had an appointment with my midwife. About a half hour into the bath (330am) things started to slow down a little. I was still contracting and still had constant pain, but I had confidence that baby would stay put. We made it through the appointment and got some wonderful advice to stop things. We were sent for a few tests and a dating ultrasound. We had opted out of ultrasounds this go around for preventative reasons, so this was our first.

My due date is definitely a guess date since I am still nursing Lily and my cycles were so sporadic. Because of this, I was *ok* with an ultrasound. That said, I was really nervous and not very happy about it. I just had a bad feeling about the whole thing. Lily measured small on her (early term) ultrasound. This one measured to be about 32 weeks. That would be a miracle, as it isn't physically possible!! I left even more frustrated, the thought of not being able to nurse Lily for weeks, and have to keep this baby cooking for that long was just too much to handle. We were able to see that baby's head it laying on my cervix. At least I'm not crazy and I really am feeling crazy pressure!! 

The good news... It's been 5 days now and every day seems to be just a little better. Less contractions, less pain, more hope. So the countdown is on. 12 days and we can have a full term bub. 12 days and we can have our home birth. 12 days and we can worry a whole lot less. :) 

Now, I'm sure you all have been waiting to see the ultrasound pics. I mean, doesn't everyone want to see that adorable little baby? Don't get your hopes up. Baby evil looks as evil as he/she acts. You may have. Nightmares after seeing these!!

This is baby's profile. Can you see the nose, lips and eye?

This is my favorite, baby's lips and nose squished like a pig :)

Baby's face. This is probably the scariest picture ever.

Another year older

Lily just completed her first session of gymnastics without me. She started in the mommy and me classes just before she turned two and had a blast! Now at 3 years and 2 months she is in the tots class and has mastered many skills. Not only can she do things like a lunge, lever touch, table shape, front support, and knows many basic terms, she also has learned waiting, walking in a line, taking turns, and listening skills. Over the last year and three months Lily has grown into a skilled little gymnast!

First Session, 1 year 11 months

Second Session, 2 years 2 months

Third Session, 2 years 6 months

Fourth Session, 2 years 9 months

Fifth Session, 3 years 2 months

I still can't believe how fast this year went! Looking forward to many more :)

Birth Preferences

With very few weeks left, I was starting to get overwhelmed. There is still so much I'd like to get done before this baby comes. We are painting and redecorating our bathroom and bedroom. We are trying to get the basement organized and easy to access. We are hoping to have the house completely clean, so the oven doesn't smell when we cook and the fridge looks like we use it regularly (looks should be deceiving ;)) But more than all that, we really need to prepare for the birth itself. I started compiling a list of my preferences for my planned home birth, an emergency transfer or a possible cesarean. I like everyone to be on the same page, even though my midwives are absolutely amazing. After finishing my lists everything became a little more real and very exciting! :) Here are my lists:

Home birth preferences: 

-Labor unassisted for as long as possible

-Attempt to birth and labor in birth pool

-Catch my own baby, if this is not possible have a willing family member assist

-Do not clamp or cut cord for a couple of hours. We would like baby to stay attached to the placenta beyond birth and skin to skin. 

-Have Lily involved as much as she (and I) are comfortable

In case of hospital vaginal birth: 

-*No blood* (advanced directive attached)

-No electronic fetal monitoring unless it is absolutely necessary to save my child's life

-No pitocin or cytotec 

-No antibiotics. I have tested negative for GBS.

-No post partum pitocin unless immediate risk of hemorrhage 

-Please do not ask me if I want pain medication.

-Only check my dilation when I am comfortable and ready.

-Do not clamp or cut the cord until the placenta has been birthed.

-Do not suction my child unless it is necessary to save his/her life.

-Please lay baby on my chest immediately following birth unless unable to do so for the life of the baby.-- Please do all checks on my chest.
-We would like to allow the breast crawl right away, please do not interfere in this time.

-We do not know the sex of the baby, please let me (or my husband) announce the sex.

-We will be taking the placenta home. Do not take the placenta from the room for any reason.

-We would like to be discharged the same day, thank you for understanding. 

In case of cesarean section: 

-I would like to have a VBAC after this birth. Please use a double stitch to repair my uterine wall instead of a single stitch.

-I would like three vaginal swabs done at the onset of the cesarean. Please keep them with me at all times. (Directions at the bottom of page)

-Please allow my husband to announce the sex of our baby.

-Please do not clamp the cord until it stops pulsating.

-Do not suction the child unless it is necessary to save his/her life.

-Please place baby on my chest for skin to skin after the placenta has detached for the remainder of the surgery. If I am not physically able, allow my husband to hold baby until the end of the surgery. Delay ALL after birth procedures (see below).

-We will be taking the placenta home. Do not take the placenta from the room for any reason.

-Do not take baby out of the room unless necessary to save his/her life. We do not consent to any trips to the nursery or blood sugar checks.

After birth baby meds: 

-Vitamin k only after mom and baby have had more than an hour together.

-PKU administered after mom and baby have had time alone.

-No circumcision (male or female)

-No hepatitis b vaccination

-No antibiotic ointment in newborns eyes

-No synagis for newborn (whether preterm or full term)

-No routine antibiotics even if meconium was present at birth

-Exclusively breastfeeding

After birth procedures: 

-Please delay all routine procedures (diapering, weighing, washing, stamping, vit k. Baby meds listed above)

-I would like to hold baby skin to skin as long as I see fit.

-My blood is NEGATIVE while my husbands is POSITIVE. If necessary I request the Mercury free Rhogam (BayRoh-D, from Bayer Pharmaceuticals)

-Do not wash our baby. I will wipe him/her down with a damp washcloth without soap when I see fit. We do not consent to any baby baths.

-I will be breastfeeding. Do not give bottles, pacifier, sugar water or anything by mouth.

-Please leave our baby in our room at all times. We do not consent to any nursery visits.

-Our son WILL NOT be circumcised. We wish to keep our baby intact.

Vaginal Swabs for Cesarean: 

1.  take a piece of gauze soaked in sterile normal saline

2.  fold it up like a tampon with lots of surface area and insert into the mother’s vagina

3.  leave for 1 hour, remove just prior to surgery and keep in a sterile container

4.  immediately after birth apply the swab to the baby’s mouth, face, then the rest of the body (my husband or I will do this if you are uncomfortable performing)

We thank you all for your hard work and for understanding our preferences. You guys rock!

Birth Affirmations

SOURCE: mateoandtobias Etsy shop

I believe wholeheartedly in the mind/body connection of birth. 

I believe affirmations help build confidence as the world tears it down.

There are so many wonderful affirmations that give me the confidence to birth the way we were meant to. ( When a woman is giving birth, she has grief because her hour has come, but when she has given birth to the child, she remembers the tribulation no more because of the joy that a man has been born into the world.-John 16:21)

Throughout this pregnancy I have kept a Pinterest board with many wonderful affirmations, along with a page in my daily Calendar. This way, I can see them often. Here are a just a few of my favorites.

"We have a secret in our culture, it's not that birth is painful. It's that women are strong." -Laurie Stavoe Harm

(If you know me personally you know that I have this on a sweatshirt. I wear it to every birth!)

"The power and intensity of my contractions can never be stronger than me: they are me."

"Know that you are safe and free. Through surrender and acceptance, we are healed."

"Slow down.

Calm down.

Don't worry.

Don't hurry.

Trust the process."

"Rain, after all is only rain; it is not bad weather.

So also, pain is only pain; unless we resist it, then it becomes torment." -The I Ching

Though I plan to have some of my favorites displayed at my birth, I also plan on displaying some from friends and family who I know are cheering me on from afar. These mean the most to me.

30 Weeks and Counting

30 weeks, I can barely believe it.  This pregnancy has flown past. As I enter into the last few months I think forward to the birth... who am I kidding, I've been planning this birth since before I found out I was pregnant! I've always known what I wanted, even before I was welcomed into the birth world. Lily's birth was as perfect as it could ever be. My midwife was so supportive and  everything turned out just the way I hoped. But after that, I knew I had to have a home birth. I knew it was the only way for me. After attending over 30 births as a doula I realized how blessed we were with Lily's birth. There is no way that would happen again without being at home. So here I am awaiting my very own home birth.

I had very high hopes for this birth. I dreamt of a peaceful waterbirth with my little one near by, enjoying the last moments before her baby brother/sister came into the world. I dreamt of catching my own baby then cuddling with both of my littles for hours alone in my own bed, nursing at leisure. But as the time has grown closer I've realized something. I've given myself the best chance to have a healthy birth and baby and no matter what happens, I'm ok with that. With a transfer rate of 2%, and a cesarean rate of .5%, I trust my midwives more than anyone else. The odds are in my favor. I have prepared my body over the course of my pregnancy with spinning babies stretches, chiropractic work,  a healthy diet and confidence in the bodies ability to birth a healthy baby. I am more prepared than I ever was with Lily, that's for sure. There is absolutely nothing else that I can do.

So my hopes for this birth? That it goes as smoothly as it's going to.

My visualization? Waking up in hard labor, calling the midwives but baby is born moments before they walk in the door.

My predictions for this birth? A little prodromal labor, Baby born at 39 and 4 weeks in the night after an 8 hour labor. 7 lb 8 oz and 21 inch little girl. We shall see :)



Now to find out if we will ever name the little thing.