I cannot believe how close we are to this little one coming into the world. It seems like just last week we found out that I was pregnant. For the last couple of weeks I had been having so much anxiety. I couldn't understand why I was so scared to labor and birth. I was having dreams about having twins and having a cesarean. I would stay awake at night and think of all the things we needed that we didn't have and all the things I needed to do before baby came. I wasn't getting any sleep and was just feeling overwhelmed at the thought of having the baby. We started to get the little last minute things done and I started feeling much better. We organized all the birth supplies, we made padcicles for postpartum healing, I wrote lists of things to do (step by step) for Barry, I got together all the midwives, photographers and Lily's support person's phone numbers, I packed the emergency hospital bag and prepared the car seats (one in our car one set up in case of ambulance transfer), I folded all the laundry and we spring cleaned (minus the overnight which still needs to be done lol). We even did a dry run of the set up for the birth tub. Still, I was a little on edge and I didn't know why. I decided to reaffirm my faith in the decisions we have made. I am so scared to go to a hospital and have my baby be taken from me. I have seen so many scary things as a doula and I think I may have some birth trauma from them. But why did I choose to have a homebirth? As I re-researched homebirth versus hospital or birth center birth I realized why I was still on edge. I know in my heart (and my brain) that homebirth is so much safer than hospital birth, but I realized I didn't feel completely supported in my decision. My husband is all in and I love that about him. But for most people that find out we are birthing at home, they question "why?" And warn me of the dangers. I wish I could protect every mother from this! No matter how much knowledge and experience I have on childbirth, those naysayers still got into my head, undermining my confidence. To all those naysayers I simply ask you to do your research. Once I had reaffirmed my faith and realized that everything is going to happen just how it happens, I felt much better. Now, I'm ready to have a baby. (But if you can hear me, a couple more weeks of good sleep is appreciated little one. No rush ;))
So what have we been doing to prepare for this baby?
I do spinning babies daily flow every other day.
I have been doing inversions and rebozo sifting daily.
I have been using the birth ball more instead of laying back on the couch.
I still go to the chiropractor weekly and have started back with acupuncture weekly.
We take a nightly family walk, even Willoughby enjoys :)
Every night before bed we clean up, just in case.
The room is *almost* completely set up.
Lily's birth bag is all set up and she is very excited to have baby brother sister (and to wipe the blood off).
All that's left to do is hang up a few birth affirmations, print out the baby log (for EC, breastfeeding, etc) and have a baby!! So let's have some fun with a few predictions :-) if you want to join in, click HERE and predict if baby is a boy or girl, when they Will arrive and how big they are!
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